Old Lad

The journey through old age is a series of milestones, each with its own significance. Retirement, loss of a spouse, the day you realise that a low seated sports car is not for you, or the day you realise you have to sit down to put socks on! To me each milestone is interesting in its own right and gives more structure to what it is like to be an Old Lad. When I was younger I occasionally used to muse on what it must be like to be old, and now I’m here it’s not like I thought it would be – more unpredictable. I think it was the great Ken Dodd who, when approaching his eightieth birthday, was asked “What is it like being 80” and gave the answer “I don’t know, I’ve never been 80 before”!

I’ve just passed my 78th birthday so that’s another milestone, and I have now been diagnosed with an official illness called Spinal Stenosis. For the uninitiated this is due to osteoarthritis affecting the small joints in the lumbar spine plus changes in the discs so that they bulge into the spinal canal. Symptoms can vary but in my case it’s a dull low back pain but quite marked stiffness in the legs. It’s what we in the trade would call a “degenerative condition “ ( wonderful loaded word – degenerative!) No cure but the main thing is to keep active. It’s tiresome rather than disabling but I’ve had to stop playing golf – the back can’t rotate enough – so that’s another milestone. What is interesting is looking back to when I was growing up how different the management of conditions like this were dealt with. For a start it was relatively unusual for men to live beyond the early 70s and arthritis like conditions often led to reduced activity and liberal use of “embrocation” – a particular favourite of the time was one called Fiery Jack! I can still recall the smell! Old people would never have dreamt of going to a gym. I believe our current approach to these conditions with more positivity and encouragement to keep active ( and perhaps not using the term degenerative) is far better. But part of the deal of living to be an Old Lad is to recognise that some activities become less easy and life does change in various subtle ways.

One thing about milestones is that you cannot predict what the next one will be. Which is all part of the fun. Some will be enjoyable and some will be a pain but it is always an interesting experience! Perhaps I will have an overwhelming urge to have a tattoo- then again I think not! As I’ve said before a sense of humour helps- so mustn’t grumble!